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Twin Town High (vol. 8) |
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‘All you industry giants SIT DOWN!’
Wednesday 12 March @ 12:28:45 |
 Louis Lenzmeier sneaks his way into the Grammys
Ed. Note: when Louis called me about getting press credentials for the Grammys a few weeks ago, I was skeptical. We certainly couldn’t afford to send him, and I couldn’t believe that the corporate juggernaut that is the RIAA would want to give space to a little local ‘zine like ours…but they did! And by a happy accident, Louis said he was going to be in town anyways. So here’s the lowdown on what it’s like to be an outsider at the collective music industry pat-on-the-back that is the Grammys.
When you go to cover the Grammys, you have to realize that it’s imperative to keep some sense of perspective. As a member of the press, you know that it’s only a matter of time before you take a breather and actually start to take a look around and realize how surreal and absurd the entire Grammy spectacle is. When you have a press credential, it doesn’t necessarily mean you have a right to go anywhere you darn well please. No, the secret security in their tuxedos and Bond-like microphones ensure that you keep your butt moving somewhere. There is definitely no standing around here. The folks at the Grammys keep you moving to where you need to go: otherwise you need to get the hell out.
At a pre-show press briefing, you get to talk to those artists who win those first pre-show awards, stuff like the Best Latin or Best Spoken-Word album. The sheer number of awards given out is excessive—let’s hope that the 2004 Grammys does not have something like Best Swear Word uttered by a ten-year-old.
As you branch out in the press area, you get to talk to those artists who are arriving for the big show. The genuine goodness of Bonnie Raitt, and the down-home sincerity of Brad Paisley in my conversations with them were welcome: they offset the drunken Debbie Harry, who claimed she should have been nominated for something, but wasn’t sure what. You shouldn’t think that the red carpet is such a marvel. Will someone tell Joan Rivers that the Phantom of the Opera looks more human than she does? Looking down the red carpet at all the TV people, it was clear that many of her “TV Press” colleagues are not far behind her in the plastic surgery department.
When you get inside the arena during the pre-show, it looks a bit empty. There are only about 7,000 people in their seats out of the 20,000 capacity of Madison Square Garden. They go through the awards quickly, as if a fire is about to break out, and the speeches seem extremely elementary. It really looks somewhat pathetic inside the big arena, which isn’t the most ideal place to hold such an important event. Seeing as Grammy just returned to New York City for the first time in five years, you have to wonder about the logic of choosing Madison Square Garden as the venue when Radio City Music Hall would have been more proper.
Yes, of course the live Grammy show is all about the performances, and eventually the Garden does fill up. Most of the awards are presented much earlier in the telecast, and the bevy of stars who line up to perform are ultimately there to push record sales. Amazingly, performers still see a spike in their sales numbers even if they sound unbelievably horrendous. Faith Hill, who blamed the Garden’s acoustics for her sounding like a wounded puppy, looked like a blitzed Marilyn Monroe.
The most intriguing moment came when the PA announcer came on the speaker right before the telecast and said “Everyone sit down, all you industry giants SIT DOWN.” Like cattle, they all attempted to make their way to their seats and sit but indeed no one was in that big of a hurry.
I think when Bruce Springsteen is anywhere within 100 miles, you feel like you have to genuflect or show some sort of homage. The fact that he did not win album of the year is a shame but his contribution in the tribute to the Clash’s Joe Strummer was the ultimate and proper way to cap off this Grammy experience where everything was on-the-go.
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